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Sabaydii,
Here is the continuation of a series ‘Coming home’ entitled ‘Searching for my old self’
Hakphaang,
Kongkeo Saycocie
Only the first few days in
I already felt tired
Tired of what I had seen
And tied of what I would see
The same old things
I thought
Muang Lao was beyond those
With a tired heart
I took refuge at Wat Phakeo[1]
The very one
Princess Khieokhom – Chao Anou[2]’s sister
Hid herself from the invading Siamese
Like any other days
Tourists thronged the place
Once housed the emerald Buddha
Phakeo now in
Inside
Thai tourists flaunted their Thai currency
Before dropping it into the donation box
Some even handed it to the temple keeper
Drawing his big smile and profuse thanks
The Thai the very ones
Causing so much destruction in this land
In this sacred temple
Were wholeheartedly welcome
Even more than our own people
Now living abroad
My heart couldn’t help to ask why
It was that eerie
With just a few drops of crumbs
And a parade of Thai royalty
Our KhuamPenLao[3] is no more
If that so
Why didn’t we sell this land
And become our much beloved – the Thai?
Why fought and lost our ancestors’ lives?
For nothing?
Would Princess Khieokhom take refuge in this temple
If this sacred ground was to be violated
By the very ones who stabbed and bled our hearts?
Oh Quon Lao[4]
Less than 500 years ago
We were but a power in this part of the world
The Siamese dared not touch us
The Vietnamese were but a weakling
Just when we became
What we were
Only heaven knows
As painful as it could be
I glared at the Thai tourists
Of what they represented
And of what we became
Like my own sad story
Unveiled before my very eyes
I stood there motionless
Is there a refuge left for me in this world?
Or the Thai are going to do to us
As they did at the time of Princess Khieokhom
Only destiny knows!
8.28.03